A Wrap Up Of The JAML Christmas Party

After how negative every thing has been this week, I decided to skip the usual "Wrap Up" and try to have some fun.  It is Christmas after all.  If you want my initial thoughts on the City Hall incident just scroll down.  Yes I know that my writings on the Clerk/Judge dispute made me look like a jack ass just a few hours after I posted it.  Also, I will be taking the next week off for the holidays.  Unless we have a snow storm on Wednesday next week.  Its at least a possibility, so keep an eye out for that.  Otherwise, I wish everyone of you a very Merry Christmas and hope all are safe.  Hope you enjoy!

The JAML Christmas Party Timeline:

7:30pm: A half hour before the party begins and the phone rings.  It's Jiyabird.  She would like us to keep the noise down.

7:50pm: Goliath is the first to arrive.  He has a dolly with several cases of Jagermeister.  He thanks both me and Mrs. JAML for the invitation and ask where the bar is at.  He pushes the dolly over to the bar and tells the bartender to take the night off.  "I got this" he says. 

8:00pm:  The guest begin to arrive.  I see several notables.  There is Oracle, Trackrat, Kelley, and HT.  They quickly go in separate directions.

8:10pm:  The city council arrive together.  They all say hello and thank me as they walk in.  Julius takes an extra second to ask me who does my landscaping.  I tell him its good and not to worry about it.  I notice Matt Owen doesn't quite seem as excited as the others.  I stop to ask him why.  He responds "I'm the DD."
I inform him if he needs a soda or anything, to let ME get for him from the bar.

8:15pm:  Quasar and MBHeights arrive smoking cigars.  As they pass by I hear them talking about getting a promotion or something recently.

8:25pm:  I go up to the bar to see G behind it.  I say "champagne please."  He says "Jagermeister coming up!"  I say "no champagne please".  He says "jager".  "Champagne/Jager/champagne/Jager..."  I realize this could take a while.

8:30pm:  As more guests arrive, someone asks who's the jack ass that took up two spots with their batmobile?

8:35pm:  YMC arrives.  He goes to get his name tag.  It says "Q".  He is not amused.

8:40pm:  Tom Galligan arrives.  This causes quite a problem in the parking area around the JAML Compound as it seems he rode in on a bulldozer.

8:43pm:  Grumpy Granny arrives.  She immediately heads to the bar to join Oracle and G.  She is over heard saying that she enjoys the lack of stress that has come with retirement.  Mike Hutt sees her and heads over to say hello.

8:45pm:  The servers announce that the food is complete and ready to be served.  As the crowd  begins to stampede towards the food (either from the thought of free food or G's bar tending) Lisa Smith halts them and reminds us all that it would be appropriate to say a prayer first.  She leads us in prayer and then says to me "thanks for the invite" and wishes me a Merry Christmas.  Apparently she can see where this party is headed and it's not her cup of tea.

8:46pm:  Jiyabird calls and ask for Lisa to keep her prayer down.

8:50pm:  Leah Farris arrives.  As she takes off her coat I notice a nasty bruise that looks like its from a seatbelt.  I ask her if she was in a wreck?  She says no.  It was from the strap on her camera and having to lug it all around the city following somebody.  But she says its healing now.

9:00pm:  Everyone has gotten a plate and begins to converse amongst their groups again.  Someone ask where the mayor is at.  Rumors are that he was either at Jazzercise or Hooters.  But neither could be confirmed.

9:15pm:  Jules arrives looking stunning.  I ask her what took her so long.  She said that sometimes she gets invited to parties and then uninvited and then invited again.  I tell that she is always more than welcome here.

9:30pm:  I'm alerted by Mrs. JAML that there is quite the line to bathroom and she's not sure what the problem is.  I make my way past the line to see Chopper Woman blocking the door.  I ask what the problem is.  Chopper responds "NO! You cant let them in.  Do you know what this will do to your sewer bill?"  I calmly hold her hand and lead her from the bathroom door and explain that JAML Corporate had another good year and that it would be fine.  As we walk away there is the sight of several people dancing in line and a few beads of sweat.  But a possible messy crisis is avoided.

9:45pm:  KFetz, TrackRat, and Kelley are seen talking about the recent incident in City Hall.  Kelley tries to throw out several other possible topics to discuss, but the conversation just keeps getting "bumped" back to City Hall.

10:15pm:  The Jager is really starting to get to the guests.

10:35pm:  Vicki Conlin arrives.  I greet her and ask her why she's so late.  She responds that she didn't get an invitation.  I assure her that I mailed them all on the same day and that I know there was one for her too.  Her response:

11:00pm:  HT seems to be getting very upset with most of the guests at the party.  He is becoming quite angry.  G quickly rushes over to him and calmly leads him over to the bar saying "Let uncle G take care of you" as he walks behind the bar and begins to fix a drink for him.

11:20pm:  There is another knock at the door.  I open the door to find two police officers standing there.  They tell me they are just checking out the party.  That while everything seems all right now, they did receive a complaint earlier about the noise.  Hmmm...

11:45pm:  I pass by Mike Hutt and Tom Galligan who seem to be having quite the lively conversation.  While the crowd noise makes is too loud for me to hear exactly what they are saying I swear I think I heard one of them say something like "miss me yet?"

11:50pm:  We decide we better get a group photo while most of the guests are still here.  Leah kindly offers to take it for us.  We take what seems like a great picture but after looking at it we notice from the back row that Mike Hutt threw up the bird.

12:05am:  G has obviously succeeded in getting HT plastered by this point.  And after the pep talk from G, HT seems to have new confidence in himself.  He yells "everyone hold on.  I'll be right back" and then runs out the door to his car quickly returning with his laptop.  He then goes from group to group showing then some of his photo shops.  Several people could be seen rolling their eyes.

12:45am:  While I'm not sure who, somebody obviously had too much to drink and tried to get a little too friendly with Grumpy Granny.  The loud WHACK! that followed briefly silenced the whole crowd.

1:15am:  With HT on one side of the room showing people his photo shops and Oracle on the other side telling his jokes, there is a large convergence of the two sides in the middle at the bar.  G seems to be keeping up well.

2:00am:  The crowd is quickly beginning to thin out at this point.  I walk over to the bar to see that G still has a nice little crowd.  Grumpy Granny and HT on one side of the bar with a TV on FOX News.  Oracle and KFetz on the other side watching MSNBC and G in the middle playing with the remote on another TV mumbling "wheres the playboy channel?"

7:15am:  I awake with a very nasty headache.  As I look out my window, I am stunned to see a batmobile still in the parking area.  Ever wake to see a batmobile in front of your house in broad daylight?  As I walk downstairs to fix some breakfast I see G and Grumpy Granny still at the bar talking and drinking.  MY GOD MAN!  G says that HT got a cab and then ask if I would like a drink.  I politely decline.

7:20am:  The phone rings.  Jiyabird would like ask us to keep the noise down.